He Said, She Said: Flaming hot at Flame Tree

The Reveler: Whoa! Did you see this Geek Goddess? Isn't this the hunk of burning love Robert Jordan?
Geek Goddess: How could I have missed this?! Why of all days did I decide to sleep in on Sunday? Argh!

The Reveler: Oooh, isn't he cute!
Geek Goddess: Yes, OH YES! And how he shakes his cute little booty! Makes you want to pinch it a bit, doesn't it?

The Reveler: He should've taken his shirt off. That would be something else.
Geek Goddess: I'm sure you would have drooled!

The Reveler: Who says white men can't hula? Now, I'm feeling hot, hot, hot here.
Geek Goddess: Finally, an appropriate statement (laughs).
The Reveler: Now, don't you start it Geek....hmp.

Artistic implants, anyone?

Spotted this at the Flame Tree Arts Festival. I did not get one, but can't say I wasn't tempted.

Relight Our Fire

Well, the title is just to get your attention once again. I must admit that I was truly insensitive about the previous post especially when I learned that the Nepalese national who burned himself almost to death inside the Labor Office this week, was there to really catch the Labor Officials' attention because he's been coming back and forth to the Labor Office to follow up on his claims from his previous case he won. He has been waiting for his claims worth $5K that his previous employer that filed for bankruptcy owes him. However, the Labor Office was about to deport him back to Nepal.

The poor guy is a member of the Dekada Group, a group that fights for citizenship here in the CNMI. His group asked me to spread the word to help the poor guy. I know, when karma hits me, it's big time. Again, pardon my French before. Those who want to help, let me know and I will give you the contact number.

The Reveler

Flame Tree Festival

It's the Flame Tree Arts Festival and surprisingly, though, it moved to the Civic Center, there were like a thousand people who trooped the opening ceremony last night. Parking was something one would hope for a stroke of luck.

It's great to feel the island culture of having fun and being exposed to different cultures here in the Commonwealth. The governor was not present during the opening ceremony. Could it be he was having his therapy at night? They said he was in another engagement. Preparing for his Commonwealth Address today, I guess.

Something to look forward to. The Flame Tree Arts Festival for its first night, did a "Pretty Darn Good" job!

The Reveler

Relight My Fire

What could lead a man to set himself on fire? Both newspapers today bannered the Nepalese that scared the hell out of Labor and Immigration officials' wits when he poured or should I say, showered himself with kerosene inside the Labor Office and lit himself literally in flames.

The poor guy sustained third degree burns and his face was badly charred. KSPN News showed this on TV, btw.

He was set to be deported back to Nepal. The poor guy has been here for 10 years.

The Reveler

Pun in the sun!

I'm sitting in a bar with some friends one Friday night. We're drinking beer and listening to our friend's latest travel tales. The Reveler interrupts. He scratches his bottom and asks in a tone that signals of a silly joke, "What do you call the first Japanese who did what I'm doing?" We hazard some guesses, but no success. He puts us out of our misery, "Itchy bun."

At work one time, The Reveler pauses to ask, "Did you know that The Police made a song about a local family?" I give him the what-are-ef-are you-talking-about look. He responds, "Well, didn't they sing A-yu-yu-yu, A-ya-ya-ya...?"

One Sunday afternoon, we're enumerating the types of phobias we know. The Reveler says, "What about the fear of soap?" We're sure there's a term for it, but we don't know what exactly. So he tells us, "Heno de phobia."

Over wine and nuts another Sunday afternoon, the discussion is about local politics and immigration. The Reveler decides it's time for what is now known among us friends as an itchy bun joke. He asks, "What would you call it if wild animals took control over the CNMI?" Everyone is clueless. He gives it up, "Feralization."

The Reveler is the punniest person I know. Not a day goes by that he doesn't come up with a pun out of whatever topic that springs up in the conversation. That's why I was amazed when I found out recently, from the book Cork Boat, that there's actually a contest for puns. Author John Pollack, a former speechwriter for President Clinton and builder of the world's first cork boat, is the 1995 champion of the O'Henry Pun-off World Championships. The competition is held every May in Austin, Texas.

Here are some puns from the contest website:

Ascent...An aroma.
Brisket...To speed something up.
Castrate...To evaluate all the actors in a movie or play.
Dollop...To dress up attractively.
Exposed...A retired model.
Forthcoming...Three visits weren't enough.
Germination...The birthplace of Beethoven.
Hi-fidelity...A devoted couple.
Hotel...A place where you trade dollars for quarters.
Institute...A spontaneous session of wind and brass instruments.
Logarithm...Tapping out the beat of a tune on a tree trunk.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN:
The Yoko club? Oh no.
The Peter Pan club? Never. Never.
The quarterback club? I'll pass.
The compulsive rhymers club? Okey-dokey.
The Spanish optometrists club? Si.
The pregnancy club? That's conceivable.
The self-esteem builders club? They probably won't accept me.
The agoraphobics society? Only if they meet at my house.

Only in Saipan

This one`s for the books. In today`s Variety, a 19-year-old man who burglarized a warehouse in Gualo Rai tried to sell a stolen pressure washer to an employee of the same warehouse he burglarized. He was arrested and charged by the Attorney General`s Office. The warehouse employee easily recognized the pressure washer for he had used it for more than eight years.

It`s a small world after all. But his stupidity and the warehouse employee`s alertness helped the AGO solve the crime.

Death Threats for the Gov.

According to today's news, the CNMI Governor received death threats over the phone last week and the perpetrator was immediately apprehended.

My friend commented, "The Governor gets a death threat? Like he still needs it?" I know, I know, lame remarks. Oh, I didn't mean the Governor is lame, he's just limping....

The press secretary said the current government just inherited these problems from the previous government, so let's not blame the government now.

The Reveler

The "L" Word

Much to my disappointment that the L Word TV series on Showtime has been on air since January this year, due to MCV couldn't get in our place of residence due cabling problem, so they say....

Well, what can we think of words that start with the letter "L" which can best describe the CNMI's "L"ocal government?

*Lax
*Latent
*Late bloomers
*Leave (as employees are always itching to leave and take a leave? Not anymore, I guess due to so many holidays and austerity holidays in the government)

hmm...what else....

The Reveler
Banner taken from L Word Official Website (LWordOnline.com)

School in October?

Whoa! Hold on! The Public School System, which follows the federal education standards will start the next school year in October and not in August? That's the decision that PSS and Board of Education officials decided if the current government proceeded with their budget cuts to PSS.

I guess students, as we were young before, would initially be happy that their vacation is going to be extended; however, they wouldn't realize what they'd be missing in the end. The public schools here really need more attention in education. According to studies before (reports from NMC) that the CNMI, though English is the major language or at least the official one, students are "bad" speakers and writers of the language. This didn't come from me, ok. It was NMC's report before.

Poor teachers. Some are from off island, who wanted an adventure in the Pacific. Now, they're up for a huge one, i guess.... Two months without pay? How are they going to pay their rent with that cut? Would their landlords allow them to skip payment for two months? Would the government include them to avail food stamps? If I were a teacher, would I remain on this island?

God forbid.

The Reveler